Selective Processing

A useful topic that I liked was the section on selective processing.  “We are capable of ignoring messages we don’t like, of tuning out tedious or irrelevant details, of interpreting messages in original ways, and of forgetting inconvenient details.” (page292) I have to agree. We do tune out things we do not want to hear or because we don’t think it is important. It’s just like sometimes I have to tell my boyfriend that he doesn't listen to me when I tell him something I think is important or he says he forgot. I have to say that this deals with selective retention, meaning he only remembered a little bit of our conversation. My mom always has a saying “You only forgot because you weren't listening, but if I told you I was giving you a million bucks you would listen”.  I also thought the term selective perception, meaning we perceive something in a different way than someone else.  

Medium Is The Message

“According to McLuhan’s theory, each medium has its own internal logic, and each affects how we experience the world.” (page 291) I can agree with this! It is important that you know which medium is best to make sure that the message is delivered properly. I believe TV is a great medium.

I do agree with McLuhan that TV is a cool medium, especially in today’s era. We use television in everyday life, to watch the news, entertainment, speeches, and music.  With television you can see and hear at the same time it gives the person watching an easier way to receive the message. TV shows everything that you wish you saw once you heard it. I believe television gives everyone that believability they may need to understand facts. For example, we may read a newspaper article on a killing and may by pass it. Once you've tuned to the news and they show you how the investigation is going and what the murderer looks like I feel like you could get more involved. Even with newspapers still around some people may just prefer watching the news than reading it. 

Cyber Friendships

When it comes to being friends with people in cyberspace I actually have when I was in high school. I remember long summers and I remember seeing my oldest sister talking to people in chat rooms and I would walk up behind her being nosey. I would ask her what she was doing and who she was talking to. I believe that was my start to finding out that you could chat with people who were all over the world and the same age as me.

The difference between my face to face conversations and Internet conversations aren't really different! You meet someone and you get to know them! I mean the conversations would be the same, but you just can't interact with them in person. If you have a web camera you can video chat. This question came just in time as a TV show on MTV just premiered last night called CatFish where people who met online get to see each other on person. I have to say that would be a little cart especially if they turn out being someone totally different. That's part of the reason I don't use my Internet as a friendship tool. Some people will turn out not being exactly who you think they're. 

Interview Skills

One of the topics from Chapter 8 that I felt was interesting was the section about interviewing skills. I had actually had a short lesson on this last semester in my business class, but I liked reading and going over some of these things again. I really liked the fact that there was a whole part about questions. It gave the questions that some employers may ask you and the importance of asking the employer some questions. It wouldn’t be right if you got yourself into a job you had no idea what a regular day could be like.

“Interviews are like exclusive parties: you can’t crash the gate; you have to be invited. That means sending out resumes and cover letters that catch the eye of potential employers and make them want to meet with you.” (page 213) It is very important to update your resume and make sure it is spruced up and can catch the attention of the employer you are applying for. You want them to see why, on paper, you are the best candidate. 

Etiquette

I have been bothered by electronics with people in my work place. The worst thing being a server is when someone hounds you down because they said they’re ready to order and then they hop on their cell phone or their iPad’s. It is very rude to use any electronics when someone is speaking to you especially when you’re the one that called them over to help you.

I feel like call waiting can be useful. When it comes to being rude or not I think there is a fine line. When someone has been waiting beyond a couple of minutes it can become very rude. Sometimes I work front desk at work and when there are people calling and in front of me I try to answer the phone first. The people in front of you can see that you’re busy, but the people on the phone do not necessarily know that you can be busy and may see it as you’re ignoring them.

Organizations and Environment

Organizations are tied to the environment because they help the environment. “Just like living creatures, organizations cannot survive without a healthy environment.” (page 200) They help the people in our community that makes up the environment.  

“The college or university you attend, for example, is a complex organization that involves many people working together to achieve a common educational goal.” (page 200) The relationship between the school and city and town that is in is they both have a goal in the city. They both help each other to maintain the city. I also noticed a lot of times the city and school can help each other to raise money or even do fundraisers together to get the communities involved.

I think schools have obligations to the city to get involved together. The city and school should work together to keep the campus and city safe. For example, how we have cops circling around our campus to make sure every student is safe. Working together can help each other. 

Rules Of Communication

One of the topics I felt were a good one to talk about was the rules of communication. It determines how we communicate with other people. This is put together as cultural level, sociological level, and psychological level.

Cultural level rules are how we communicate with people we do not know. Our culture of being polite and using what we know is proper ways to address strangers. In this area our topics are limited, we wouldn't tell strangers our personal information we tell family and friends.

Sociological level rules are how we communicate with group membership. In the book it uses college campus as an example and how we use slang to say hello. We may say “What’s up” instead of Hi as a greeting. Nothing too formal here. 

Psychological level rules are how we communicate with people on personal levels. We may name call, joke, or even hug and kiss. You are comfortable with your family and friends so you know the boundaries of discussion.

I saw this very cool because of how people can move into these rules of communication. Especially since someone we don’t know may get greeted through the cultural rules, but go on to become a great friend and we will communicate with them on a psychological level later on in life. 

Potential Romantic Partner

This question took me a little bit of thinking, but I really enjoyed picking my brain on some of the characteristics and behaviors that lead me to label someone unattractive as my romantic partner. Someone who feels like they cannot be honest or communicate is the two biggest unattractive traits to me. I feel like if you cannot be honest to someone you just met, then you probably are dishonest about a lot of things.

In our book it says that, Steve Duck feels that attraction is really a process of elimination. I do agree. When we are getting to know someone and we are only attracted to the physical we are just waiting for the parts of them we don’t like.  As soon as someone shows me something I don’t like early on in the dating stage I will cut them off.

I have DEFINITELY eliminated someone by using a sociological or pre-interaction cue only to reconsider them based on interaction and cognitive cues. I think we all make these reasons why we can’t date someone only to find out they are exactly your match.

Patterns

In my opinion the hardest pattern to change would have to be symmetrical pattern. Competition is an everyday life thing. You are always trying to one up someone or gain a better position in life. You are fighting to one up someone in everyday life.

The most damaging to a relationship would have to be rigid complementarity.  In the book it says, “When the submissive partner begins to resent always giving in or when the dominant partner begins to tire of being in charge, dissatisfaction can result. “ (Page 140) This is very true, I know it is very hard to take the back seat and let someone take control, especially when you’re so used to being in charge or disagree with the person in charge. Even being someone who always has to be in charge or make the family decisions it can become tiring because you may feel like it’s time for someone else to take initiative.

The most damaging to self-esteem would have to be complementary pattern.  One partner takes the one-up position and the other takes the one-down. (page 140) One person gets the short end of the stick. I feel like the person who takes the one down must feel like they do not have enough responsibility or don’t feel adequate enough to have an authority position.